What am I really accomplishing?

What will I think is one of my greatest accomplishments when I am 80?

That the counters were clean and that I was very diligent in checking my news feed on facebook once a day?

I think not.

Good article to remind me what's most important!
http://simplehomeschool.net/on-being-busy-or-being-full-how-can-we-tell-the-difference/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+SimpleHomeschool+%28Simple+Homeschool&utm_content=Google+Reader

WOOT!!!! WOOT!!!! I got a job!!!!!

YIPPEEE! Today I got a job offer and it felt SO right to accept it!

"Things work out. they always do" is a quote I say to myself everyday, but sometimes the faith and belief is a little (or majorly lacking!)

I have been so blessed with every job I've ever had (truly)... from Chopsticks in the Cougareat (where I worked with my roommate), Marketplace cafe (where I got to work with my best friend! and talk to cute business students, to F.A.R.M.S (where I met so many amazing people, to the Belfer Center (which led me to Juliette), to the past incredible 5 years working for their family while earning my masters degree and then working as a school counselor. It is because of them providing me the opportunity to move down here and had such a fabulous year... and now it is because of them that I have my new job!!

Up until a month ago I would have told you I was only looking for school counselor jobs for the fall. Yes, I enjoy school counseling, but as I thought about this past year I realized how much MORE I loved my days with the kids! It was like I wasn't even working I enjoyed the days so much (mostly!) Well, thinking I couldn't make enough to live off of what a nanny makes, I had it in the back of my mind as a fallback for a job in case I didn't get a school counseling one. I knew I would do whatever I had to do to make ends meet.

Well, I ferociously applied for all school counseling jobs I saw in the past three months, but the number of jobs offered was SIGNIFICANTLY less than any other year I've seen. People are not retiring and schools are watching the budgets and counselors are not as essential as teachers!

So, about a month ago I was talking to a friend who hated her current job and hated to go to work. Of course, not being in the situation, I thought the solution was simple. QUIT and find something that makes your happy! Do you really want to do something you hate for the next 30 years?! Easier said than done.

BUT, as I thought about it, I realized this is what I was doing. I LIKED school counseling, but I didn't LOVE it! I LOVE nannying! So, I thought I'd give it a try while still pursuing the school counseling thing. I got lots of interviews with families by word of mouth... and I applied to a few local agencies. I feel like I have interviewed with almost any type of family dynamic and have witnessed a lot of parenting styles. I quickly determined I was going to be picky because I didn't want just ANY nanny job, I wanted to enjoy the kids and feel like I could have a good working relationship with the parents because you really do almost become like a member of their family!

I was sad to see how many parents were so "hands off" with their kids. Even if they got home early one day from work, they didn't want to get involved with the kids until they had been fed and bathed and ready for bed. Only then could the nanny step back and let them put their kids to bed. Or, how many times I saw a child ask mom or dad for help to get their attention, but they just kept saying "in a minute" while they were on their blackberry's and that minute never came. Or, one family told me that they call their nanny "mom" because that's what she really is to them.

These families were not for me. I wanted parents who realized the value of having a nanny, but also realized their role as parents and that when they are home they WANT to be involved with their kids! I also wanted a family that was very open about communication and expectations, but provided the nanny with flexibility and trusted her... NOT hovering or being a helicopter parent. I wanted a family that had set rules and expectations for kids, limited the yelling as much as possible and tried positive, proactive discipline. Also, I didn't want to work 60 hours a week in order to make ends meet.

I knew this would be hard to find... and I was about to settle for a family which would have been OK, but they didn't meet all of my ideals above and I would have had to be a live-in... which i wasn't too thrilled about either)

BUT, THEN!!!! Juliette mentioned to me last weekend that she had just found out her friend was looking for a new nanny. My style is to not at least pursue every avenue till I know it's a NO, so I said I would love to meet with them! On Wed, Juliette's neighbor called me (who I know very well) and told me she's best friends with this mom and just emailed them a recommendation for me. She said I would be a fool to not work for them!! :)

I met with the mom yesterday morning and was pleased with what they were looking for in a nanny and it also seemed like they valued their nanny more than many families I interviewed with. After our conversation we agreed that I would come to meet her husband and the kids today.

Well, I spent two hours with them today and was impressed with their family from the moment I walked in the door! I had a string feeling that this was the right job for me (if they felt the same in return and offered it to me!)

I start the Monday after I get back from my Alaskan Cruise and I just feel SO BLESSED and so fortunate. I can't wait to see what this new opportunity brings!! And, I also have Juliette to thank for it! And, the Lord too :)

Never say Never... My first earthquake!!

So, I never thought DC would have as bad as a winter as we has this year. But, even more so, I would have placed a bet that DC would never have an earthquake that I could actually feel!!

(Yes, I know anyone on the west coast can laugh their way through this post as you would probably sleep right through it as being an everyday experience!!)

But, at 5 AM Friday morning (July 16th!) I was in my first earthquake! I had spent the night at Juliette's and I woke up and literally thought the boys were RUNNING like crazy through the house at 5 AM (which they never do, but I wouldn't put it past them :) It seemed to only be for about 20 sec., but I felt the house walls shaking. It also sounded like a plane was going to land in our front yard, a train going through our front yard, or there was an explosion outside (all thoughts I didn't want to have at 5 AM). I did think for a minute if that's what an earthquake might feel like, but then realized I was in the basement and everything would topple on me, so I quickly tried to forget that thought...

But, I was right! My very first (and what I hope to be ONLY) earthquake! No damage... the best kind of earthquake if we must have one!

http://www.nbcwashington.com/news/local-beat/36-Magnitude-Earthquake-Shakes-DC-Region-98589124.html

And, as a funny side note... there were emails sent around about what to do if you are in an earthquake and the suggestion for those who were in bed sleeping was to put a pillow over your face. Somehow, to me, being in the basement, I didn't think a pillow was going to help much if the entire house came crumbling down on me. But, maybe it would. I'd rather not test it out though!!

Perspective

It REALLY all comes down to this:

“It is vital to know that there really is a God, that there really is a Savior, Jesus Christ, that there really is impending immortality for all men, that there really will be a judgment with genuine personal accountability, and that there really is purpose in life and a divine plan of happiness for man.

“When we know such basic truths as these, then we know what really matters, how to approach life and how to view man in the universe. There is great power in perspective. Therefore, the adverb ‘really,’ as used by Jacob [ Jacob 4:13 ], is deeply significant” (Neal A. Maxwell, Things As They Really Are, 4).

What brings happiness?

Happiness.

What makes one happy? Or, how can one be consistently happy? This has been on my mind a lot lately. Of course, I know that being obedient to the commandments and covenants we make brings happiness, and that the plan of salvation brings happiness, but what about all that day to day stuff not related to religion and faith. What of that brings happiness?

Over the past many, many years, researchers, psychologists and economists have tried to figure out what makes one happy, or what makes an entire nation happy. I googled “happiness’ and found entire websites and blogs dedicated to helping people discover their true happiness. The official wikipedia definition is: Happiness is a state of mind or feeling characterized by contentment, love, satisfaction, pleasure, or joy, and research galore! Webster defines it as good fortune/prosperity (which I thought was very interesting); a state of well-being and contentment; a pleasurable or satisfying experience. I think I agree most with the middle definition of “a state of well-being and contentment.”

Recently I asked friends for some book suggestions and someone suggested a book by Eric Weiner entitled: The Geography of Bliss: One Grump's Search for the Happiest Places in the World. I liked the title a lot and thought it would be a humorous book as well as intriguing with my recent reflections on “happiness”. The book is basically about the author’s search for what makes a nation happy? Is one country's sense of happiness the same as anothers? He chose his destinations in the world by going through all the research – I didn’t even know there is an academic journal entitled “Journal of Happiness Studies” because there is such a focus on this topic right now!! Currently Americans are somewhere in between the happiest and the unhappiest nations. I was shocked to find that Iceland is one of the happiest considering for major parts of the year it’s too cold to even LIVE and it’s DARK!

In his book, Eric speaks about the U.S. obsession with happiness relative to our country’s founding documents ~ Life, Liberty, and The Pursuit of Happiness ~ “We suffer from the unhappiness of not being happy,” Eric says. I believe this is really true! There is this pressure and added stress on us in America to figure out WHY we’re not happy, if that is the case, because gosh darn-it, life isn’t worth living if you’re not 100% happy every minute of everyday … and it’s all your fault! On his travels, Eric observed that other countries obsess about happiness less and tend to be happier for it. He spoke about the great paradox of happiness ~ “It’s a ghost, it’s a shadow. You can’t really chase it. It’s a by-product, a very pleasant side effect to a life lived well.”

He also found it refreshing and happiness-inducing to be introduced to other cultures, and reminded that our American values are not the only/best values -- in fact, they're often counterproductive in the search for happiness. It's an obvious statement, of course, but there are definite things we can learn from other cultures: not to fear failure, not to over-analyze our own happiness to death, not to deny the inevitability of the moment.

He goes to Thailand, and finds that not thinking is their method of being happy! He comes up with a

“Be Thai” Happiness Recipe:

*Don’t obsess about happiness;
*Don’t think too much;
*Put much effort into life, but lower your results expectations;
*Don’t be envious; and
*Cultivate trust and relationship

…. Hmmmm. Some of those are interesting, but I think I agree with all of them!

Gross National Happiness (GNH) - He goes to the tiny Himalayan kingdom of Bhutan, and discovers they have an official policy of Gross National Happiness! Did another wikipedia search and basically found that the concept of gross national happiness (GNH) was developed in an attempt to define an indicator that measures quality of life or social progress in more holistic and psychological terms than the economic forecaster gross national product or GDP. “GNH is a strong contributor to the movement to discard measurements of commercial transactions as a key indicator and to instead directly assess changes in the social and psychological well-being of populations.” Read more about it here... but interestingly it serves as a unifying vision for Bhutan's five-year planning process and all the derived planning documents that guide the economic and development plans of the country. Proposed policies in Bhutan must pass a GNH review based on a GNH impact statement!

Work/Life Balance? --Interesting research I also found: Data shows that another important factor in a nation’s happiness is work-life balance. While Scandinavian countries boast a high GDP per capita, the average workweek in that part of the world is no more than 37 hours. In China, which got a low score of just 14.8, the workweek is 47 hours and the GDP per capita is just $3,600. Hmm….. I think this is one problem in America!! Another would be unemployment. (UH-OH… this is soon to be me!) Research has found that low unemployment also contributes to happiness. Denmark's unemployment rate is just 2%, according the C.I.A.'s World Factbook. Norway's is just 2.6%. The Netherlands: just 4.5%. Many economists concur that a 4% unemployment rate reflects a stable economy. The U.S. unemployment rate is currently 9.7% and that’s only lower than it has been recently because of the 500,000 temporary census workers hired (of which my mom is one of them… and that’s stories for another post I should have her write!! Stories to make you laugh and cry… stories that also make you wonder what the census organizers are doing for 9 years in preparation because it all seems VERY disorganized!)

Think Differently?
One major lesson the author learned along his way was that people in foreign countries think differently. Why would this matter, I thought? I know they dressed differently, ate differently, talked differently, but understanding that they THINK differently is important, he explains. Not only should it make one more understanding and tolerant to know this, but maybe thinking, but not thinking too much, has an impact on our happiness?!

In America, the majority believe that thinking and analysis are important, but the Thais don't think so. One of their expressions is ‘Don't think too much.’ J As I thought about this I found virtue and value in it! I know, CRAZY thinking on my part. I work in a school. My job is to promote education and THINKING! And I do. I think that examining ideas, literature, cultures, politics, etc. is very important. However, I think many of us have taken it too far and we OVERTHINK. My mom loves to watch these news programs where all they do is talk and debate all day! It drives me CRAZY. I think you should listen to the facts and then decide for yourself—and that’s that. Maybe listen to a few others share their thoughts and opinions, but MY WORD, why debate and argue all day long just to prove you’re right?! Why debate and argue in the first place? Or, overthink something until you can’t decide how you feel about it and it becomes a stumbling block in your life.

Another example of this is the show Seinfeld. Yes, this show is funny but it also drives me crazy too! They spend the entire show talking about nothing, nitpicking every detail of everything and no one seems to be very happy. If we OVER THINK, I THINK this is a good example of how it leads us to misery!

And, I am not saying we should be ignorant or close/small-minded. But, why think and worry so much about things that are of no matter to you? Or, recently I heard the best advice and try to remember it everyday. DON’T think or worry about things you CAN’T control!!! Ha, ha… one of the best comments in the book was his noting that they don't sell a lot of self-help books in Thailand, or England, or anywhere else really other than the U.S. And, I’ll admit. I am a succor for them!

At the end of his book, Weiner's concludes: "Money matters, but less than we think and not in the way that we think. … A little bit of money will buy you a lot of happiness, but a lot of money won’t buy you much more.

Side note: According to a 2005 editorial, published in the British Medical Journal and authored by Dr. Tony Delamothe, research done in Mexico, Ghana, Sweden, the U.S. and the U.K. shows that individuals typically get richer during their lifetimes, but not happier. It is family, social and community networks that bring joy to one's life, according to Delamothe.

Back to his final thought: “Family is important. So are friends. Envy is toxic. So is excessive thinking. Beaches are optional. Trust is not. Neither is gratitude....Our happiness is completely and utterly intertwined with other people: family and friends and neighbors and the woman you hardly notice who cleans your office. …

Happiness is not a noun or a verb.

It’s a conjunction. Connective tissue.

I LOVE THAT. And firmly believe from my own personal life that it’s true.

"Happiness is one hundred percent relational,"

as also stated by one of his interviewees, Karma Ura, Bhutanese scholar and cancer survivor. We can only be happy with other people, because happiness does not exist in a vacuum. This also relates to his recipe for happiness. There are the basic ingredients (as mentioned above) but there are variations on the recipe depending on where you live in the world because of cultural influences. The author compares happiness to the atom carbon: arrange it one way and it is coal. Arrange it another, and it is a diamond… but in the end, in my opinion it all comes down to people. The people we’re around every day, those who love us and we love in return… and all the others that cross our paths along the way… how do we treat them and what is … our relationship with them??

29 Simple Secrets of Happy People ... need one more!

One of my favorite roommies gave me this book "100 Simple Secrets of Happy People" a few years back. I went through and pick out the ones I liked the most... there are 29. I'd like to have 30!! Please comment and add what you think it should be at the end!!

My 29 Simple Secrets of Happy People:
1. If you want to know if people are happy, don’t ask them how much money they have in the bank, ask them about their friends!
2. You’re life has meaning and purpose
3. Choose companions wisely
4. Cultivate friendships
5. Turn off the TV
6. Accept yourself-unconditionally
7. Are open to new ideas
8. Share with others how important they are to you
9. Don’t face problems on their own
10. Are not overprotective or overly worried
11. Do what they say they’re going to do
12. Are not aggressive with their friends and family… even if they are right!
13. Know what really matters in life
14. Little things (like the tone of your voice or the words you use) have big meanings!
15. Know that it’s not WHAT happened, it’s how you think about what happened
16. Share themselves… they don’t hold their feelings, thoughts or hopes inside
17. Don’t blame themselves
18. Never trade their morals for their goals
19. Get a good nights sleep
20. Accomplish one thing every day
21. Are flexible
22. Serve others
23. Smile a lot and are agreeable
24. Don’t forget to have fun and reminisce
25. Give themselves time to adapt to change
26. Need to feel needed
27. Say “So What” when necessary
28. Have a Purpose
29. LOVE, UPLIFT, SERVE, LISTEN TO and CHERISH OTHERS
30. … hmmm…. What do you think has been left off the list?!

A special day :)

Today was a very, very special day.

Not only have I been hearing about the events of today for the past three weeks, but I just can't even believe that this little boy that I have known since birth graduated from preschool! Where have the past 4.5 years gone?! It was a happy celebration today, of course, but a little sad too as I realize how precious time is and how quickly it can pass us by!

Well, my little buddy graduated today with FULL HONORS :) He is such a smart, funny and gentle little boy. He blows me away with how curious he is, how he is able to put information he is learning together, and his determination. He makes the most random comments, hilarious at times, but very intelligent at other times! He wants to be just like his big brother and sister and gets frustrated when he realizes his limitations because of age and size. He doesn't know the meaning of the words "use indoor voices" and loves to talk, talk, talk! However, around new people he gets so shy that sometimes others don't get to enjoy the experience of getting to know the REAL Jeremiah! He's got the funniest giggle, the cutest smile that will light up your day, and so much energy, optimism and enthusiasm! He's got a HUGE sweet tooth (like me) and loves going to Target with me because he knows he'll always get his blue frostee treat before we shop! He also has these gorgeous blue eyes and dark, long eyelashes that women pay tons of money for! He's stolen my heart... and I am sure will steal the hearts of many girls in the future!

But, today was his special day. The day, as Jeremiah has been telling me for weeks, you get to eat CAKE BEFORE DINNER and have TWO parties!!! Needless to say, he was beyond excited!

Well, it just so happened that today was GORGEOUS until about 15 minutes before the scheduled graduation when a TORNADO warning was posted and storms quickly rolled in. Hence, a very expedited graduation ceremony.

Few quick words by his teachers followed by the children gathering in a circle to sing the song they sang every morning to start off the day as a class. (He's in the black shirt right next to his teacher who has such a lovely British accent!)

Then, it was the famous diploma awards ceremony.
The kids climbed up into the tree house.
When their name was called they got their diploma,
ran down over the rickety bridge and down the slide.

And, of course, a picture with a proud mother
and her preschool graduate!

And, then it started chucking it down! Rain, thunder, strong wind and lightning! What a scene. Cake was still to be had. It was just a little damp and eaten inside :) Then... of to the graduation parties with lots of juice boxes and goldfish, I'm sure!!!