Today, I was rereading some of the talks from last General Conference in preparation for this weekend's conference.
This story caught my mind and my heart:
"During the very early years of her life, our niece Lachelle spent the mornings with her grandmother. The two shared a special bond from these hours together. Lachelle soon turned five years old and was preparing to begin school. On their last morning together, Grandma Squire read her granddaughter a story and rocked her in the big rocking chair. “We have had so much fun together, Lachelle,” she told her, “and now it is time for you to go to school. I love you so much; what will I ever do without you?”
With wisdom beyond her five years, Lachelle looked up at her grandmother with big brown eyes. “Grandma,” she said, “I love you too, but it is time I got on with my life.”"
This story struck me for two reasons... 1. I used to spend a lot of time with my grandmother before I went to school and after school as well. I shared a love and memories of jelly beans and dolls with her that I will never forget!... 2. My thoughts have been in my own life recently "Am I getting on with my life?... or am I stuck?"
I know I was stuck in Boston, so in a way this move has been part of what I needed... but I feel that I am still stuck in the "comfortable and familiar" and I am not sure how to change. Or, it's more like "the heart is wanting... but the flesh is weak."
I am also of the belief that we can either choose to change on our own, or we're compelled to if we ignore the need to change. I fear this compelled change is sooner rather than later in my life.
I think fear and lackage of faith are my biggest hold-ups. "Grandmother’s lap is ...more comfortable than the trials of kindergarten." President Thomas S. Monson has counseled us that “faith and doubt cannot exist in the same mind at the same time, for one will dispel the other” (“Come unto Him in Prayer and Faith,” Liahona and Ensign, Mar. 2009, 6).... and there's definitely FEAR in my mind! Keeping an eternal perspective is also very challenging for me.
So, where do I go from here? Recognition is first step, right? Then, I think comes prayer, fasting an temple worship... and listening to the prophet's words.
What GREAT timing for GENERAL CONFERENCE this weekend!